Things I hate about exercise classes...

So I've been taking a couple classes at the Y.  One is a kickboxing class, the other PHAAT class.  PHAAT stands for Pretty Hips, Abs, Arms, and Thighs.  Dumb name?  Yep, you bet.  But it's actually a really good class.  Think Pilates on smack.  The instructors rotate so there's always something a little different each class.  There's Kathryn, the nazi.  Seriously one of the hardest instructors I've EVER had.
Then there's Heidi, the compact drill sergeant.  The first time I saw her, I thought "she's short and plump.  How hard can this be?"  Uh...she would show us an exercise then run around the room yelling at us to pick up the pace.  She had a big smile though.  Probably because she is a narcissist.
Next would be Jill, the Barbie doll.  Think large chest, tiny waist, tiny hips.  Hate her on principle.  Good teacher though.
There are a few others but I don't remember them quite as well.  So in all my classes, here's what I hate.

•  When class starts, I like to look around and see who's less "physically inclined" than me.  Sadly, there are days I'm the worst, and that includes the old blue hairs.
• Occasionally Frequently I find myself doing the exact opposite of the teacher.  Face the left wall?  Nope, I'm facing the right and looking like a fool until I figure it out.  Last week it was a good 3 minutes until I realized I was seeing everyone's faces when I should have been seeing their butts.  I'm smart.
• I refuse to be the one lagging behind.  So I will just about kill myself to keep up.  Luckily, since I'm getting more in shape, this isn't so hard.  Still, there are days I just want to sit down!  
• Sometimes the instructor will look in the mirror at everyone then mention something not to do.  Inevitably the last person she looked at was me.  
• The instructors don't seem to remember that not all of us have A cup boobs.  For those who have nursed 2 babies and are carrying around some extra weight, our boobs flop around.  Think of a fish out of water, flopping around on the ground.  Sad and a tad disgusting yet, like a bad accident, impossible to look away.  I'm sure I've scared some of these poor high school girls with my post-nursing knockers.  Maybe I'll scare them into keeping their legs closed until they're good and ready for the consequences to the boobage. 

Even though there are many things I hate about the classes, it's still fun to go.  And at least I can make fun of myself.  Isn't that the goal in life?  Well, maybe just mine.  

Hannah's Christmas Program

Today Hannah had her 1st ever Preschool Christmas Program.  Let me just say that my daughter is amazing.  Granted, I am her mother.  However, she did SUCH a great job.  Before I became a mommy I would've thought the program was the cheesiest, silliest thing in the world.  But now that I have a child up there, I think it's awesome.  It's still cheesy and corny but if you look at all the parents/grandparents in the crowd, we're all just eating it up.  I had a dorky grin on my face from the moment Hannah walked in the door to the moment we got back in the car to leave.  I'm so proud of her.

Hannah in her new Christmas dress

Mommy and Hannah

Noah really wanted to be in the picture.  I think Hannah was sick of smiling!

My little reindeer girl

I don't remember what song they were singing but Hannah was really into it!

What a cutie!

She is holding the "R".  I was the proudest mother there

She did such a good job with her prop

She's been hanging out with Aunt Salli a little too much.  She's starting to pose

Proud daddy with his little angel

Proud mommy.

Vinegar...the Windex of remedies

Remember the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"?  In it, the father would swear that Windex could cure anything.  Have a zit?  Windex it!  Sore joints?  Windex!  I've never tried Windex on anything but windows.  Maybe it works great on other things, I don't know.  However, I recently discovered something that's been around since Jesus was a child, yet I had never used it except in recipes...White Vinegar!  Seriously, it's my new favorite thing.  Why?  Because it works as so much more than a nasty smelling ingredient!

Whenever I'd go to the chiropractor, I'd let my kids play in the kids' room.  I'd always see a spray bottle of "homemade" disinfectant.  What was in it?  Vinegar!  I never really thought about vinegar being a disinfectant.  I always just used Lysol.  Recently we bought a cool mist humidifier for each of the kids' bedrooms.  While looking at the cleaning instructions, it recommended using VINEGAR to clean it!  Really?  Not bleach or some other super expensive cleaner?  Nope, good ol' cheep white vinegar.  Dilute with warm water and let sit.  It was that easy!  Hmmm....vinegar is looking like a good product.

Noah's been pretty cranky lately.  He had croup a few times, plus the classic drippy, snotty nose grossness.  I started to wonder if he had an ear infection because he just seemed to cry at the randomest of times.  But no fever, sleeping pretty well, eating ok.  I really didn't want to take him to the doctor if he didn't have any other symptoms except fussiness.  I had a feeling I'd be labeled as "that mom".  So a few days ago I used my mommy secret weapon...google.  I figured there would have to be other moms who had fussy children and thought perhaps ears were the culprit but didn't want to go to the doctor quite yet.  Yep, there were about 9 million sites that came up (perhaps a huge slight exaggeration there).  Guess what many moms suggested putting in the child's ears?????  (If you don't have an answer, you're not paying attention).  VINEGAR!

SO I decided to try it.  The website said to warm up the vinegar in the microwave just a smidge then put a few drops in the child's ears and let it soak in.  Ok, easy enough.  I thought I'd better try it on myself first just in case there was searing pain or something.  (well, let's be honest...if Joel had been here, he'd be the guinea pig.  But he was already gone for the day).  I tipped my head to the side and dropped a little in there.  Weird. Even though it was warm vinegar, it felt cold.  It kinda stung for a few seconds then felt pretty good.  It's like my ear got a good cleaning.  I figure if vinegar can disinfect toys and humidifiers, it's not too bad for my ear.  Ok, now for Noah.  He was a little confused why I was tipping him sideways but stayed pretty still for me.  After a few seconds, he cried.  That was probably when the stinging sensation hit.  After a split second of crying, he stopped and stared at me.  I waited a few minutes then did the other side.  Same thing.  A second of crying then fine.  Within a few minutes, he was up and playing again.  So far, he's acting like his old self!  Now, granted...I don't claim that vinegar can cure cancer or something.  If Noah had signs of an ear infection, we'd be going to the doctor for sure.  But since I suspect he just had ear pain, not infection...a home remedy works just fine!

Everything's coming up...pink

Noah has been fighting a cold, just like every other child in America right now.  He has croup again.  We first noticed that tell-tale bark sound the day after Thanksgiving while we were in Minnesota at that awesome waterpark.  So off I went to an urgent care clinic thinking Noah needed a steroid, since that's what has happened the 2 other times he's had croup.  The doctor exams Noah and says "Yes, he has croup but we don't treat croup".  Excuse me, what?  I promptly pulled mama bear out of my coat  asked kindly why not.  His response was that croup is a virus and Noah would get better on his own.  I'm sure he could see the bear claws frustration in my face because he then said that giving Noah a steroid would be treating him "prophylactic ally" and that's not how he does things.  Basically it was a wasted trip.  My barky son and I left sans steroids.

Fast forward to last night.  I picked up Noah from day care and almost fell over when I saw him.  His eyes were completely swollen and covered in that nasty matty stuff.  My first thought was "allergic reaction!  Save the airway!".  Then I backed off the freak out train and figured he's fighting a cold.  It's probably clogged tear ducts. No big deal.  Joel was working late so I got the kids home and fed, all the while wiping that nasty snot stuff off Noah's eyes.  The 3 of us started watching a movie and snuggling when Joel got home.  He took one look at Noah and said  "He's got pink eye!".  Huh?  Really?  Now let me just say this.  I've never had pink eye.  Hannah has never had pink eye.  I've never been around anyone with pink eye, probably because it's uber contagious so whoever had it was quarantined.  So upon learning that Noah may have pink eye, I did what any mother would do.  I googled  it.  Let me say something else.  I hate eyeballs.  Of all the gross things I do with my job, nothing grosses me out like eyeballs.  I can stick contact in my eyes every morning but the thought of anything else pertaining to the eyeball makes me cringe.  I learned very quickly last night that while google is great for many things, it's best at seeing close up pictures of nasty pink eye infested eyeballs.  Sure enough, Noah's eyes looked quite similar to many of those suffering from bacterial pink eye.  So I called the pediatrician's office.  They're open until 8pm and it was just after 7.  Surely they'd still be able to see Noah.  Nope.  The way-too-chipper-for-her-own-good secretary told me that yes, Noah should be seen tonight but no, they can't possibly see him.  Thanks.  That was helpful.  So off to urgent care I went.  Within a few minutes of being there we were ushered into a room and in came the doctor.  Yep, it was pink eye.  Then I thought...hmmm...I'm here with a doctor.  I'm going to mention the croup thing.  He listened to my tale of woe and right on cue, Noah barked.  I couldn't have planned it any better.  The doctor agreed that Noah also has croup.  But would he give us the beloved steroids?  Sure did!  According to this amazing urgent care doctor who is quickly becoming my new best friend, steroids aren't going to hurt a child.  Children don't build up immunity to steroids like they do antibiotics.  And if it helps Noah to breathe a little easier, what the problem? Yep, new best friend right there.  In came the nurse with the meds and I grinned from ear to ear.  She probably thought I was crazy.  The doctor also gave us a script for eye drops which has helped Noah immensely.  Since pink eye is so contagious, I'm fully expecting 1, if not all of us to end up with it before the weekend is over.  At least I know what urgent care doctor I would like to see :)